Inklings Bruce Sanguin's blog
Contending with Your Inner Critic
We’re our own worst critics. It’s a cliche but it became so by being true. Yes, a minority of humans have the opposite problem. They let themselves off the hook too easily. These folks have zero capacity to objectively assess their own behaviour, show remorse when they’ve wronged somebody, or hear any critical feedback without … Read more
Saying Goodbye
I recently hit the road, destination Winnipeg, Manitoba, the city I grew up in and which I left at the age of 18 swearing I’d never return. Never did, at least not to live. I left because it’s so goddamned cold. Then, after the interminable cold summer would arrive. Green worms hung menacingly from dying … Read more
The Many Faces of Denial
Most of the time I’ve spent on my healing journey (ongoing) was about breaking through denial. Or more accurately having my ego broken. A working definition of the ego is that it is denial in the form of a personality. We build it so that we don’t have to see and feel things as … Read more
A Good Man Is Hard to Find
Flannery O’Connor’s short story, A Good Man Is Hard to Find, plays with the idea of goodness as conventionally understood. A family sets out on a holiday with grandmother in tow. Grandmother, although of good Christian stock, is manipulative and willful. En route, they hear that a murderer named the “Misfit” has escaped from prison, … Read more
Escaping Narcissism
The roots of narcissism may not be what you think. Typically we equate the narcissistic personality with somebody who is “full of himself”. The truth is the opposite. There is a vacuum where a self used to be. Therefore everything a narcissist does is motivated by filling the vacuum. Everything and everybody is recruited to … Read more
Trade in the performance of “good” for the practice of true
If you’ve worked with me at all, you’ve probably heard me use this phrase, “Trade in the performance of “good” for the practice of true. “Good” is in quotation marks because “good” behaviour rarely is truly good, meaning it’s not coming from a true place within. As Mark Twain put it, “good in the worst sense … Read more
Coming at Happiness Sideways
“I just want to be happy”. This is a fairly common refrain I hear from frustrated clients. And fair enough. Who doesn’t? I woke up this morning, feeling, well, not happy. And I wish somebody could have waved a magic wand and make unhappiness disappear. But happiness is a tricky thing. You set out to find it … Read more
Getting Your Yes’s and No’s Straight
If I ever write another book along the lines of “living a life that’s your own”, getting your yes’s and no’s straight will be one of the fundamentals. Seems simple enough. Before any decision you make, before you respond to any request from another, or any opportunity that comes into your life, listen for the yes or the no. And, … Read more
Demystifying Purpose
Have you noticed how much is out there about finding your soul’s purpose? You know, the reason you’re here. There’s a thing you’re supposed to be doing that is aligned with spirit or soul or G_d and until you find that thing you’re not going to be happy. Usually, this invitation is accompanied by an eight … Read more
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Dismantled: How Love and Psychedelics Broke a Clergyman Apart and Put Him Back Together
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