self-actualization

People Pleasing – An Overview

People-pleasing arises from a deeply ingrained belief, often formed in childhood, that one is not enough as they are. This belief drives the need to generate added value to justify one’s existence. At its core, people-pleasing stems from the idea that one’s natural self—spontaneous and authentic—is insufficient. The perceived lack isn’t just personal; it feels … Read more

Most of Us Are Living In the Past

“The past is not dead. It’s not even past” — William Faulkner Most of us, most of the time live in and through the past. The past isn’t what happened back then. It’s the neural networks we groove into our brains about what happened to us. The past we live in is the meaning we … Read more

The Ultimate Guide to Ending People Pleasing

Introduction: Are You Tired of Being a People-Pleaser? Well, the ultimate guide to ending people pleasing can help. If you’ve ever felt stuck in a cycle of putting others’ needs above your own, saying “yes” when you want to say “no,” or constantly seeking approval, you’re not alone. People-pleasing is more than just a habit; … Read more

The Elusive Mystery of Happiness – Part 1

Ever noticed that the more you try to find happiness directly, the more it eludes your grasp? My hunch is that this is because happiness isn’t properly a goal of life. It’s a feeling that happens when you get some other things right. The U.S. Declaration of Independence affirms that the “pursuit of happiness” … Read more

What Are You Trying to Prove?

What are you trying to prove? Maybe you’ve heard this one directed at you when you did something reckless or annoying. Minus the emotion and directed objectively toward ourselves it can be revealing, even healing. When taken seriously, as a question of self-inquiry, (and not as an attack) it gets at what’s driving our emotional … Read more

Bruce Sanguin

Psychotherapist