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When Parents Are Children
In Alice Hoffman’s novel, The Museum of Extraordinary Things, Ezekiel Cohen is ten years old when his father decides to end his life by jumping off a dock into wintry waters. His father is saved by dockworkers, but Ezekiel is left with crippling guilt that he didn’t jump in to save him (even though he couldn’t … Read more
Read MoreDistinguishing Needs from Wants
I once told my mentor and therapist, Andrew Feldmar, that my wife “needed” more from me. He stopped me there and said, “babies need, adults desire”. At the time, the significance of this didn’t register. I thought he was splitting hairs. I forget when the coin dropped, but when it did it delivered the goods. (Thinking … Read more
Read MoreThe “I” and the “Me”
Ever notice that we seem to have more than one self at play? We catch ourselves acting spiteful, jealous, envious and petulant, status-seeking and driven. On the other hand can be relaxed, generous and kind. What’s going on? There are various ways and systems of thought to slice and dice this, (sub-personalities, parts, etc.) but … Read more
Read MoreStop Trying to Change Yourself
You’ve tried everything. Therapy, yoga, positive thinking, meditation, exercise, and fasting. You’ve been on retreats that promised the kundalini serpent would rise up and awaken you. You’ve opened your third eye, cleared your chakras, done past life regressions. Maybe you’ve tried psychedelics. You expected that everything would change. But guess what, at the end of … Read more
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