I was born into the world to love it.

To love my mother, father, siblings, and the trees, the sky, the rain.

When I discovered I couldn’t love my mother because her heart was closed

the love transmuted into “fuck you” .

It is a revelation to understand the darkness, the heaviness,

as what becomes of thwarted love.

The other day violence was renounced in me by some intelligence

that got through my ego

eliminating my right to contempt and derision.

I had never imagined that wanting to hurt another being,

was light turned dark for lack of expression.

That it is all a corruption of love.

Criticism, judgment, gossip, meanness, sarcasm, bitterness

All love’s lost voice, lost touch, lost embrace.

This renunciation, a gift of grace,

and angels who refuse to give up on me,

leaves only love, a softened heart, grief for lost years

and a chance to fall in love again,

with the world.

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