A Good Man Is Hard to Find
Flannery O’Connor’s short story, A Good Man Is Hard to Find, plays with the idea of goodness as conventionally understood. A family sets out on a holiday with grandmother in tow. Grandmother, although of good Christian stock, is manipulative and willful. En route, they hear that a murderer named the “Misfit” has escaped from prison, … Read more
Escaping Narcissism
The roots of narcissism may not be what you think. Typically we equate the narcissistic personality with somebody who is “full of himself”. The truth is the opposite. There is a vacuum where a self used to be. Therefore everything a narcissist does is motivated by filling the vacuum. Everything and everybody is recruited to … Read more
Trade in the performance of “good” for the practice of true
If you’ve worked with me at all, you’ve probably heard me use this phrase, “Trade in the performance of “good” for the practice of true. “Good” is in quotation marks because “good” behaviour rarely is truly good, meaning it’s not coming from a true place within. As Mark Twain put it, “good in the worst sense … Read more
Coming at Happiness Sideways
“I just want to be happy”. This is a fairly common refrain I hear from frustrated clients. And fair enough. Who doesn’t? I woke up this morning, feeling, well, not happy. And I wish somebody could have waved a magic wand and make unhappiness disappear. But happiness is a tricky thing. You set out to find it … Read more
Getting Your Yes’s and No’s Straight
If I ever write another book along the lines of “living a life that’s your own”, getting your yes’s and no’s straight will be one of the fundamentals. Seems simple enough. Before any decision you make, before you respond to any request from another, or any opportunity that comes into your life, listen for the … Read more
Demystifying Purpose
Have you noticed how much is out there about finding your soul’s purpose? You know, the reason you’re here. There’s a thing you’re supposed to be doing that is aligned with spirit or soul or G_d and until you find that thing you’re not going to be happy. Usually, this invitation is accompanied by an … Read more
Hurts So Good: Let’s Get Kinky
Turning and turning in the widening gyre The falcon cannot hear the falconer; Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold; Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world, The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere The ceremony of innocence is drowned; The best lack all conviction, while the worst Are full of passionate intensity. —William Butler … Read more
When You Feel Like Giving Up
Not everybody is ringing in the New Year with unreserved optimism. For some of us, it’s all become a bit too much and all the New Year resolutions and positive affirmations to the contrary have a hollow sound, empty of power to make a difference. COVID doesn’t help. We’re getting ground down. The late psychiatrist, Scott Peck, opened … Read more
Honouring the Masculine and Feminine
This is an inquiry about when to act and when to surrender, which is to ask about the relationship of the feminine and the masculine. One of my mentors, E. Graham Howe, defines the feminine (in both genders) as the capacity to experience change. The masculine (in both genders) is the capacity to change experience. So … Read more
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Dismantled: How Love and Psychedelics Broke a Clergyman Apart and Put Him Back Together
This book describes my healing
journey with psychedelics.
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