Inklings Bruce Sanguin's blog
Demystifying Purpose
Have you noticed how much is out there about finding your soul’s purpose? You know, the reason you’re here. There’s a thing you’re supposed to be doing that is aligned with spirit or soul or G_d and until you find that thing you’re not going to be happy. Usually, this invitation is accompanied by an … Read more
Hurts So Good: Let’s Get Kinky
Turning and turning in the widening gyre The falcon cannot hear the falconer; Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold; Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world, The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere The ceremony of innocence is drowned; The best lack all conviction, while the worst Are full of passionate intensity. —William Butler … Read more
When You Feel Like Giving Up
Not everybody is ringing in the New Year with unreserved optimism. For some of us, it’s all become a bit too much and all the New Year resolutions and positive affirmations to the contrary have a hollow sound, empty of power to make a difference. COVID doesn’t help. We’re getting ground down. The late psychiatrist, Scott Peck, opened … Read more
Honouring the Masculine and Feminine
This is an inquiry about when to act and when to surrender, which is to ask about the relationship of the feminine and the masculine. One of my mentors, E. Graham Howe, defines the feminine (in both genders) as the capacity to experience change. The masculine (in both genders) is the capacity to change experience. So … Read more
What Is Healing?
What is healing anyway? To answer that question, we need to ask another question: What is a human being? Healing is recovering from anything that causes you to feel and act less than human. Which begs the question, what is it to be human? I was listening to a podcast in which the host asked … Read more
An Eye for Difference
As of July 1 we have been residents of our island property for two years. The original owners planted literally hundreds of species of trees, shrubs, plant cover, etc. It’s paradise. Sort of. You see, it’s taken me the full two years to be able to see through the tangle of growth into the original … Read more
It’s the End of the World As We Know It and I Feel Fine — R.E.M.
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it … Read more
When Parents Are Children
In Alice Hoffman’s novel, The Museum of Extraordinary Things, Ezekiel Cohen is ten years old when his father decides to end his life by jumping off a dock into wintry waters. His father is saved by dockworkers, but Ezekiel is left with crippling guilt that he didn’t jump in to save him (even though he couldn’t … Read more
Anxiety As Memory
I remember not being able to sleep as a little kid. I was anxious. I didn’t know the word for it back then. Just felt like there was a lizard crawling around in my stomach. I’d grab my pillow and hold it close. By some strange grace I realized back then that worrying about not … Read more
Distinguishing Needs from Wants
I once told my mentor and therapist, Andrew Feldmar, that my wife “needed” more from me. He stopped me there and said, “babies need, adults desire”. At the time, the significance of this didn’t register. I thought he was splitting hairs. I forget when the coin dropped, but when it did it delivered the goods. (Thinking … Read more
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