Inklings Bruce Sanguin's blog
Anxiety As Memory
I remember not being able to sleep as a little kid. I was anxious. I didn’t know the word for it back then. Just felt like there was a lizard crawling around in my stomach. I’d grab my pillow and hold it close. By some strange grace I realized back then that worrying about not … Read more
Distinguishing Needs from Wants
I once told my mentor and therapist, Andrew Feldmar, that my wife “needed” more from me. He stopped me there and said, “babies need, adults desire”. At the time, the significance of this didn’t register. I thought he was splitting hairs. I forget when the coin dropped, but when it did it delivered the goods. (Thinking … Read more
The “I” and the “Me”
Ever notice that we seem to have more than one self at play? We catch ourselves acting spiteful, jealous, envious and petulant, status-seeking and driven. On the other hand can be relaxed, generous and kind. What’s going on? There are various ways and systems of thought to slice and dice this, (sub-personalities, parts, etc.) but … Read more
Stop Trying to Change Yourself
You’ve tried everything. Therapy, yoga, positive thinking, meditation, exercise, and fasting. You’ve been on retreats that promised the kundalini serpent would rise up and awaken you. You’ve opened your third eye, cleared your chakras, done past life regressions. Maybe you’ve tried psychedelics. You expected that everything would change. But guess what, at the end of … Read more
Endure Nothing and Nobody: Take Back Your Life
The Impact of Failures of Love I’m grateful to my mentor and therapist, Andrew Feldmar, for this principle. When he first dropped it on me I remember being speechless. I could hardly imagine putting it into practice. It’s wisdom spread through my system like a time-release capsule. Here’s why I think it’s so hard to … Read more
Privilege the true over the good
From the time we arrive the world wants us to be “good”. It’s easier for our parents, for our teachers, for just about everybody—except perhaps our selves. Al Gore wrote the Inconvenient Truth over twenty years ago, related to the environment. But it could be applied to our own development as human beings. We learn … Read more
Siddhartha: Part 2
In Part 1 I reflected on Hesse’s novel, Siddhartha, as a journey about the challenge of becoming an individual. Only by realizing our individuality—what it is to be a self connected to but distinct from the collective—do we become fully human, and make our unique contribution to humanity and the evolution of our species. Our … Read more
Siddhartha: Becoming an Individual (Part 1)
I intend to write this reflection in two parts, tracking the spiritual progress of our protagonist, Siddhartha, and then riffing on some possible meanings for our own spiritual journey. I must be one of the very few who had never read Herman Hesse’s classic novel, Siddhartha. It’s based (sort of) on the life of the … Read more
Anxiety and the Homicide-Suicide Continuum
Is it just me or does it seem to you that there is more and more anxiety creeping into our society, particularly younger generations? The list of possible causes is endless, including at the physiological level, processed food; at the technological—an increase in the amount of screen time, including the constant barrage of beeps and … Read more
I Shall Not Want
The most beloved Psalm in the bible is the 23rd, which opens with “The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want”. I always thought it meant that wanting was wrong. I read it as an injunction. “You shall not want”. If “the Lord” is my shepherd the spiritually realized individual shouldn’t want (or need) … Read more
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